4th PNA today.

I'll go in for my 4th PNA in about 5 hours. I admit it, I'm nervous. It's been a while since I last seen a doctor. A little over 3 weeks, but that's a long time for me. Over the course of this pregnancy, I've averaged seeing a doctor about every 2 weeks (not by choice for some of them), but it was helpful to see a doctor to either hear the heartbeat or see the firecracker on u/s. The longest time I went in between doctor's appts was in the very beginning when I first found out I was pregnant and when we went on our trip. Now I feel invested.

I know I shouldn't be worried. I should be standing on my faith, that all is going well. But I'm a crazy lady and google is not my friend right now, and I read all these sad stories of women who lose their children far along into the pregnancy or have still born children. I dont know why I do this to myself. I drive myself crazy. Then I drive DH crazy by asking him to reassure me that all is ok.

DH may not make it to the doctor's appointment today. He's working on fixing up our house so we can put it on the market at the end of August. So if he's not done with his project, he wont be able to come. I told him it was ok, because the biggie appointment (where we go back to the perinatologist for another level 2 u/s) is next week monday, but now that he may not be coming, I'm more terrified. What am I going to do without my rock? Ugh.

I cannot think like that. Everything is going to be fine. It's going to be perfect. It'll be a boring appointment, pretty much like how most of my appointments have been. I need to stop working myself up into a nervous wreck!