Sleep Training Saga...

Well there's good news and not so good news (well it's all good news in my book, but anyway).

1) The sleep training was successful. Sorta. After the 2nd night (after my last post where Kaua took over 1 hour to sleep, then finally went down with grandma's help), he slept all the way till 3 am then got up to nurse. And man oh man, were my boobies soooooorrrreee from all that waiting! The 3rd night, Kaua went to sleep after only 15 MINUTES!!! AND on top of that, ONLY 7 MINUTES of those 15 were actually crying minutes. The rest were just fussing minutes. AND the 4th night, psshh, my professional sleeper fell asleep after ONLY 7 MINUTES OF JUST FUSSING --- NO CRYING! Whew pat myself on the back, huh?

2) ok, here's the bad news. Since then, we haven't been able to sleep train because our schedules have been such that we haven't been home around Kaua's sleep times, so he's had to fall asleep either in his carseat, or in my arms after nursing, etc. So all that loveliness.....is out the door. We try again.

3) and here's more bad news. Even though the ST was going well on nights 3 and 4, Kaua still got up more often through out the night. Before he was 3 months old, he'd only get up 1 or 2 a night to nurse. But lately, and even on nights 3 and 4 of the ST, he's been getting up four or five times a night. He'll get up once before 12 am and about every 2-3 hours thereafter. It's insane! I read that sometimes, babies just kinda fuss, then go back to sleep, so I should wait it out for a few minutes to see if he's actually up...and yup, each time he is.

So what has all this getting up in the middle of the night business led to? more CO-SLEEPING! Ugh. I know, I know. I'm a bad mommy. But who the heck wants to get up 4-5x a night, sit up, nurse their baby, then wait 10-20 minutes for him to fall back asleep and pray that when you put him in his crib he doesn't get back up? Not me! So when he first gets up? I bring him right into our bed, pop that old booby out, he nurses, and we both fall asleep. It's bliss..till he gets up in 2 hours wanting to nurse all over again!

Ugh!

So tonight I'm trying a different approach. We've added rice cereal to his meal repetoire (spelling?). I know, its a smidge early (he'll be 4 months old on Saturday)...but I think he's ready. He's huge, probably over 16 pounds by now and in 6 month old clothes already. He's eating like crazy and I think he's ready. I also know that feeding rice cereal isn't a cure all for sleeping through the night, but I think in this case, it could help. We'll see. I only added a tiny spoonful to breast milk tonight, to see how his tummy would take it. He chomped it up like a champ, not even batting an eyelash when sucking down the bottle, and fell asleep shortly thereafter on the carride home, so I think we're doing ok in that department. The test will be to see how many times he gets up tonight.


If he does well, we'll slowly increase the amount and go back to the sleep training. I'll work on the co-sleeping thing sometime in between all of these big plans......

Sleep Training Begins

I've begun Sleep Training! Ugh! (For those wanting to learn more about it, see this helpful thread on babycenter). http://community.babycenter.com/groups/a199215/teaching_your_baby_toddler_to_sleep

I decided to start ST with Kaua because I'll be going back to work part time starting next week. (Yup, I got a job!!! And yay, it's part time...3 days a week!) Kaua sleeps very early (approximately 6:30pm-7pm) and because I have hula two nights a week from 5:30pm to 7pm, there may be some nights when he'll probably need to be put to sleep without me. Also, normally, Kaua will only fall asleep after nursing or by rocking him to sleep. This takes a toll on me because it takes him a while to fall into a deep enough sleep where I can transfer him to his crib. I want him to learn how to self soothe himself to sleep so that I can just put him in his crib and not have to worry about him waking up immediately (which would then necessitate another round of rocking him into a deep sleep. This pattern can take anywhere from 1 to 2 hours to actually get him to sleep).

Anyways, through sleep training, Kaua is supposed to be able to sleep longer through the night and have better naps, and of course, learn how to fall asleep on his own, without rocking or nursing.

So tonight was night number 2 of the sleep training, and man is it awful!!!

Last night, the first night wasn't so bad, but I think it's because I cheated. Kaua ate at about 5pm and appeared tired around 6:30pm, which is his usual sleep time. So I rocked him to sleep then went to put him in his crib, but he woke up. I did not feel like rocking him to sleep for another half hour, so I decided, ST was going to begin that night. I left him alone and initially he was cruising around in his crib just staring at his mobile. He eventually got tired of that and started crying (which would normally prompt me to pick him up). I let him cry and went in to check on him and patt/reassure him to calm him down every 5 minutes (as instructed by the sleep training method I'm following). In between the checks, I logged onto the babycenter thread for more information and encouragement. That's when I learned that there are different types of cries a baby makes and realized that I had been patting and reassuring Kaua during whats known as the "mantra" cry which is a big no-no, in the sleep training instructions. So last night I probably prolonged his sleep because I had essentially been waking him up instead of helping him to fall asleep during some of my checks/pats. Anyways, to make a long story short, last night he eventually seemed to fall asleep on his own 45 minutes after I first tried the sleep training. Not bad I have to say!! But 20 minutes later, he woke back up and sounded pissed. By this time, it was about 7:50pm and since he had last ate at 5pm I believed he was probably hungry. So, I picked him up, nursed him and he was fast asleep in about 10 minutes. So I'm not sure if any of that sleep training stuff actually worked last night.

Tonight, I waited to nurse Kaua until just before his bedtime at 6:30pm (so I knew he was full when I started is sleep training). Then when he was finished nursing and almost sleeping I put him in his crib. Of course, he woke up when I put him down, but he just kinda hung out in his crib for 10 minutes. Then he got bored and started fussing. When no one went to pick him up, he started crying. After about 10-15 minutes, I went in to pat and reassure him to calm him down. I did this twice and each time, he would become calm, but as soon as I left, he would resume crying. When 7:45pm rolled around, he was still crying hysterically, I went in to pat him a 3rd time. But it didn't work; he continued to scream at me, essentially saying, "why wont you pick me up mommy?" It was so heartbreaking. My DH came in and we both tried to pat him to calm him down, but he wasn't having it. Finally, I gave in and picked him up. He continued crying, as if in an acusatory manner and DH was a little distressed so he asked to hold Kaua. We got him to calm down and went into the computer room to read online as to what we should be doing. At this point, my mom came in to see if she could help. While I perused the thread, my mom took Kaua and rocked him back to a drowsy state. Because he was so tired, he was almost asleep in her arms in 2 minutes. So she took him to his crib and put him down. He fussed a little, but she stayed patting him through the fussing and in about 2 more minutes he fell fast asleep.

Again, I'm not sure if we did the correct way of sleep training tonight because like last night, Kaua basically had some assistance in going to sleep. But I'm hoping this will eventually evolve into us putting Kaua into his crib and him falling asleep on his own. I dont want to wait till he's older because by then he'll be able to roll around and will be able to throw even bigger tantrums.

It's awful to hear him crying like that and I feel like an awful parent to let him cry. I wonder if Kaua has thoughts of abandonment or fear and it makes me so sad to think he may be having such feelings. But reading the posts in the baby center thread is very encouraging because many other moms are going through the same things. I know in the end this is the best thing for him because he needs to learn how to fall asleep on his own.....

I'll keep you updated on our sleep training chronicles.

because he's too adorable not to share

Kaua has really gotten into the business of laughing recently and its so awesome!

Kaua also does his version of mama and dada (but we know he hasn't connected those words to us yet)!

It's my fault!

I created a monster -- a co-sleeping monster, and its all my fault!

It started so seemlessly. A friend had mentioned that she breast feeds her baby at night while lying in bed. She said it was sooo easy. She just rolls over, offers her breast, baby eats, and they both fall asleep. Eventually, she'll wake back up to move baby back to her crib.

So I thought, what the heck, she's a mom of 3 kids, she knows what she's doing, why dont I try that? So I did it, and the first few times where weird, it got messy. Kaua would dribble and there'd be a wet spot where he was nursing. Kaua also crowded me by snuggling so close to me, I felt squished in bed. I didn't like it, so I stopped.

Then I decided to try it again. I got smarter and put a burp cloth underneath....that solved the wet spot. I somehow got used to him snuggling next to me and didn't feel so squished. I also started LOVING the luxury of NOT having to sit up in bed for 20-40 minutes at a time about twice a night waiting for Kaua to finish eating and waiting for him to fall back into a deep sleep so I can move him back to his crib. I also loved not having to get up out of bed to check on him, make sure he's warm, make sure the blanket isn't covering his face.

And thus, our co-sleeping adventures began. Of course, I got lazy and eventually never moved him back to the crib after his first feeding. This went on for approximately a month.

But there's a downfall to this co-sleeping business. Guess where Kaua sleeps in our bed...in between DH and I. So you know what that means...no brown chicken brown cow...at all.

Last night, I decided, I'm going back to my old ways. I'm strictly going to breast feed him, sitting up, then put him back in his crib. (Like I swore I was going to do exclusively from the beginning.) I wanted cuddle time back with DH. Guess who was having none of it....Kaua.

I tried putting him back in his crib four times and he got up each time and cried. I woke DH up and asked him to try. His efforts failed. Eventually, after 1 hour of trying and approximately 45 minutes before DH had to get up for work, we gave up and gave in and let Kaua sleep with us. Guess who fell instantly asleep the moment his head hit our bed.....that little boy!

I guess we try again tonight!!